Sandlor

Grandpa Bud

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Bud, or “Grandpa,” as so many of us called him, had a complete and purpose driven life.  

Born July 27, 1917, Merwyn Leander Wistedt, was the second child of four born to Gustaf
Leander and Emily Augusta Wistedt in Marshall Minnesota.  Bud married his roller skating
darling Loretta Erickson on March 30, 1940.  Together they made their home, raised three 
children, and lived together in the same house in St Louis Park for over sixty years until
Loretta’s death on April 7, 2005.  Bud continued to live in his house until this past Monday.
He was in the hospital just a little over 30 hours before he passed away.  He is survived by
his sisters Marie and Sally, his children Bob, Mary and Lori, his four grand children and
eight great grand children.

Bud’s spirit did not die last Tuesday.  Bud’s spirit is still alive and all round every one of us in so many ways.  His life was an inspiration for aging gracefully and dieing his way with pride and dignity.

The best way to describe Bud’s life is by how he lived it.  To Grandpa almost everything correlated with work. He believed in working hard in all aspects of his life.  Bud worked hard at work and he worked hard at play.  He worked hard for his family and he worked hard as a volunteer.  There was only one speed when it came to Bud.  As George Carlson, a Camp Fire volunteer friend of Bud’s always said “All you have to do is figure out what that old Swede is up to and then stay out of his way.”  Bud put the same dedication to a job well done whether it was for his long time employer Ewald Dairy or part time employer Shell towing as he did for the Rabbi Roberts or for his wife Loretta’s “honey do” list.  And true to form, that dedication also extended to the dance floor cutting a groove to the polka band that was playing at Medina. 

If you think about it, Bud’s life might be best illustrated through a job description that went something like this:

Position Title:  Husband, Father, Grandfather, Great Grandfather, Brother, Uncle, Son, Cousin, Volunteer, Neighbor and Friend

Objective:   "Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to polka in sideways, hammer in one hand, screw gun in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and exclaiming "WOOO what a ride!"

Direct Supervisor:  Well that’s an easy one – Grandma! 

That’s why we all knew we where in trouble when she went first!  You wouldn’t believe how many discussions we had over who was going to be the one to have to say “O BUD!!” when he was in need of direction.  We all knew Grandma was good and a gift from God but I for one would not be opposed if someone would recommend her for sainthood. 

General Qualifications:  Devoted Family man, ethical, hard worker, highly organized, Master Carpenter and Handyman, creative problem solver.  Proficient in multiple kinds of polkas and two steps.  Quotable communication skills a must.

Essential Functions:   Must be able to take on the weight of the world while maintaining that father knows best persona.

General Responsibilities:   This is an easy one also - His Family. 

Bud’s devotion to his family came above most other things.  He was not a couch potato, a sports junkie, or a car nut.  Bud wore the titles “Provider” and “Family man” with pride. There was never any doubt where his family fell in the priority list.  Actual, this was probably the hardest thing for Bud after Loretta died and it was clear that his own health was failing also.  He had no one left to take care of. 

Grandma and Grandpa had a pretty simple division of labor.  Loretta was in charge of people.  Bud was in charge of things.  For almost all of Bud’s life he had been the one responsible for providing so many things for his family.  He saw his purpose for living was to take care of his family and others not have others take care of him.   

As a teenager in the depression Bud went off to work on the county work crew to qualify for commodity food to help support his family.  As a young man, Bud worked multiple jobs to help put his sisters through college while also supporting his own young and growing family.  Bud also continued to work his father’s family farm evenings and weekends until his own kids were well into their teen age years.  As a retiree Bud provided support and resources to help his children take care of their needs and their children.  

Specific duties:   This is where Bud’s spirit shined and will continue to shine on for years to come.  As the saying goes, “The gold is in the details” and what a detailed list of specific duties he lived.  It’s these details of Bud’s life that show us how his spirit will continue to live on.

Bud’s Spirit lives on in his family…….

Bud passed on his dedication and strength of caring that could be seen in all that he did.  Lori tells the story of her father picking up his own father’s frail body and carefully carrying him in his arms taking him for help.  That moment so beautifully symbolizing the heart of a man that picked up so many when they were down.

Bud’s Spirit lives on in the stories of his life’s adventures…..

Countless family vacations across the US when his kids were young, ten bus tours, and three trips to Europe including a trip to the Scandinavian countries are just the tip of ice berg.  When Bud retired, he transformed a van into a mobile home and circled the country every spring and fall for several years visiting family and friends along the way.

Unlike most men Grandpa’s age, Bud was never in the service.  During World War II Bud had one of the few jobs state side for men in a metal foundry that a “Rosie the riveter” just couldn’t do.  Grandpa got the job at the Quest Foundry in Minneapolis when he was 17.  Bud, as so many did back then, lied about his age to get the job.  Seven years later by the time the United States entered WWII Bud had already been in that job for several years thus the foundry kept him on as an essential worker. 

Bud’s Spirit lives on in his accomplishments…..

His proudest accomplishment is of course being a good provider for his family.  As many of you know a job well done was very important to Bud.  Myself, along with several others considered it very high praise when we would get a compliment on our work from Grandpa.

Bud believed whole heartedly in helping his family whenever he could and he was very proud of the fact that he was able to do so much on a milk man’s salary.  Grandpa was always there with a willing hand, ready to do his best.  Whether it was braces for the grand kids, or air conditioners and cars for his own kids he felt it was his responsibility as a provider to help.  He always said that he would rather spend his money when he could see for himself the good that it could do for his family rather then saving it to pass on when he was gone. 

Bud often joked about his “girlfriends” that he took care of.  Whether it was Mrs. Harding who lived on the corner that he helped for thirty years after her husband passed away or the two sisters over a couple blocks or the rabbi’s wife, Bud helped these ladies for years by performing general handyman tasks around their homes.

Bud’s Spirit lives on in his friends….

Bud’s life was full of friends.  Grandpa loved meeting people.  He talked to everyone – often to dismay of Loretta.   

When we as a family were searching for pictures for this slide show that you all have been watching and enjoying, one thing was strikingly clear.  Grandma and Grandpa had a lot of friends.  Whether it was the roller skating gang of their youth or the neighborhood friends that passed through Edgewood Avenue, each and every friend was special.  There were the square dancing friends, the mall walking friends, the bus tour friends, the old time dancing friends that called themselves “the Twenty Grand” and their Camp Fire and Camp Tanadoona friends.  Each one of their groups of friends shared in a special part of Bud’s life. 

Bud watched this slideshow a couple weeks ago at his house.  The pictures brought both a smile and a tear.  So many good memories and far too many friends and family that have passed away before him.  

Bud’s Spirit lives on in the many volunteer projects he accomplished…..

There were so many projects that Bud completed out at Camp Tanadoona over the years that by the end of our time there Grandpa would say to me, “Someone sure did a nice job on that….”  And I would say yeah – you did!!!

Grandpa was not a risk taker.  And you know, in the ten years we worked on projects together at camp he never caught on to me tearing things apart so that he would fix them.  Lori would make a casual call to “check in” with her parents and low in behold Grandpa would be there the next day cause he heard I was tearing the shower apart and might need a hand putting it back together.  It worked every time.

Bud wasn’t looking for awards for his accomplishments.  To him a heartfelt thank you meant more then any pin or ribbon.  That’s not to say his service wasn’t recognized by Camp Fire and others.  In fact by the end of his tenure at Camp Fire they had to start making up awards to give him because he had gotten all the ones he could but they still wanted to recognize a job well done and say thank you.

Bud’s accomplishments, knowledge and wisdom will live on through his teachings.  Jason, the camp maintenance guy for a few years, once said he learned more from just watching and helping Grandpa then any book could have taught him and I would have to agree.

I for one will never forget Bud’s words of wisdom.  “A poor workman always fights with his tools.”  “Measure twice cut once”  “A man on horseback can’t tell the difference”, “Who in the hell…..”, and my personal favorite “damn kids”

Bud’s Spirit lives on in his passion for living….

Can you believe that Grandpa got in trouble once?  I’m here to tell you it’s true.  I heard it straight from Bud himself.  Actually if Grandma were still around I think I would have heard a lot more stories about Bud getting in trouble then just the one that he told me.  So this one story will have to do.  When Bud was about ten years old his uncle had him move the truck.  Well, he knew how to make that model T go but he didn’t know how to make it stop!  But all wasn’t lost.  He used the fence in front of the house to help him stop the truck.  As he put it, it was a better alternative then the tree or the water tank.

Bud had a passion for dancing.  There was no sweeter music to Bud then his polkas and he had a lot of them.  I should know.  I had to listen to all his polka cassettes when he had me put them onto cds.  It was after that event that I made the rule to never do that again.  Mary and Lori, on the other hand, will have fond memories of dancing in the living room with their father while he waited for Loretta to get ready.

Bud’s passion for living was only matched by his can do attitude.  He was one of those guys that when he made his mind up he could do just about anything.  One day he decided to quit smoking and he did.  I can personally think of too many times to count when Lori would ask Grandpa to work on a project and he would say, “What makes you think I can do that.”  Lori’s reply, “You’ve never failed me yet.”  It didn’t matter if it was building a new dining hall kitchen, moving a tree, constructing a barn, designing a giant bat that had to fly uphill, sewing up the holes in his jean pockets cutting and permming Grandma’s hair or building a boat with Bob.  There wasn’t much of anything that he couldn’t or didn’t do.

After Loretta died Grandpa at 88 had to learn how to cook and do the laundry.  Although we did discover that no matter how many cooking and cleaning lessons Mary and Lori provided the one thing that they were never able to get Grandpa to do was dust.  He said that he just never found a dust cloth that fit his hand.

Just this past Christmas, Grandpa told Mary in one of their daily conversations that he now realized how much he never really fully appreciated all the things that Grandma did to make their house a home.

If there is one thing that I want you to remember about Bud’s life is that he was a man determined to live his life to the fullest and to live it his way.  At the end when he chose not to seek treatment for his kidney disease it was because according to him he had been there done that and it was time to get off this Merry Go round.  It was time to move on.  On to what he wasn’t so very sure of.   But he was comfortable with the fact that he lived a full life.  There was nothing in Bud’s life that he felt he hadn’t gotten enough of.

Some of you might remember this poem from Grandma’s Memorial Service.

I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright.
I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun more.
I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive.
I wish you enough pain so that the smallest joys in life appear much bigger.
I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.
I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.
I wish you enough hellos to get you through the final good-bye.

Bud and Loretta’s lives together were full of more then enough.  Probably enough for two life times if anyone is counting. 

At the end of a long day working at camp Grandpa would come into our office and sit for a moment before his journey home.  Just before he would leave he would call Grandma on the phone.  His message was always the same. For me, I would like to think Bud phoned in that same message to Grandma just before he passed away Tuesday evening after a hard days work and surrounded by his family.  “Put the pot on Bessy I’m coming home.”